This past weekend, approximately 50,000 people converged upon Myrtle Edwards Park on Seattle’s waterfront for Seattle Hempfest. We all know what Hempfest celebrates. It is about smoking weed. For most attendees, that means smoking dope as a recreational hobby. Without spurring a debate, I just want to remind everyone that smoking spleef purely for leisure is still against the law. On the other hand, beer is legal.
It is what I call the Hempfest-Beerfest paradox.
I am not anti-Hempfest. Not at all. Do not accuse me of being anti-Hempfest. I am not. What I am is pro-beer fest. Sure, the legalization movement has a presence at Hempfest. Sure, the people who support using marijuana as medicine have a presence, but let’s be honest here: we all know why most people are at Hempfest. Why can the Rastafarians, stoners, hippies and hip-hopsters have a big festival in a city park and openly do something that is illegal while we hop-heads cannot have a similar festival to celebrate beer?
There are reasons. They are not good reasons, but there are reasons.
Them’s the Rules
First off, recognize the kind of festival I’m talking about. All-ages, family-friendly and whatever hyphenated adjective you like that suggest “not for grown-ups only.” For the sake of argument, I am talking about that kind of beer festival. For example, the Washington Brewers Festival, the big daddy brew fest held each year on Father’s Day weekend, which the Washington Beer Commission organizes and operates. I am talking about a festival that involves beer the same way Bumbershoot involves music, the Bite of Seattle involves food, or Hempfest involves weed.
Simply put, it is illegal to have that kind of beer festival at a city park. Since a city park is probably the only place big enough to have such an event in Seattle, end of conversation.
You can have a beer garden at a big event in a city park, but the big event cannot be a beer festival. Think about the beer gardens at Seattle’s biggest festivals. The beer garden is a fenced off, tightly controlled area for adults of legal drinking age only. That is how you can serve beer at a big festival in Seattle—quarantine the beer drinkers in a cage where they can enjoy their filthy little habit.
That is the law as I understand it. I recently talked to a Captain with the Seattle Police Department about the issue. Apparently, my understanding is sound.
From what I’ve heard, that is one of the main reasons the Washington Brewers Festival has always happened “out there” at some State Park or County Park and not in the city. The organizers want to allow kids at the Father’s Day brew fest.
The Washington Brewers Festival as we know it, or another festival like it, cannot happen at a Seattle City Parks facility. The city would have to change a law or grant some sort of an exception. I don’t know if the city would do that and I don’t know if anyone has ever asked.
There might be an easier route to beer freedom. If there were some way we could make our beer festival about free speech, then the City of Seattle must allow it.
The City of Seattle decided a long time ago that Hempfest is an expression of free speech. Because smoking weed is illegal, pot smokers have the right to assemble and peacefully rally for its legalization.
One festival is legal because it is illegal. The other is illegal because it is legal. Now that is a paradox.
What’s more, the Seattle Police Department provides free security services for Hempfest. Dozens of cops work Hempfest because the event is a recognized expression of free speech. The city does not get compensated for all that security. The city must provide security for the event. Not only is Hempfest allowed, it is protected.
One festival is legal because it is illegal. The other is illegal although it is legal. Now that is a paradox.
Sadly, beer is legal. Did I just say that? Therefore, we cannot have a beer festival that resembles Hempfest. Instead, we must shuffle off to the beer cage and drink within its typically unpleasant confines. It’s humiliating.
It Could Happen
Is it possible to get the city to play ball on this one? Maybe. We will never know unless someone asks.
If anyone could get it done, it would be the Washington Beer Commission. After all, it is the only official state commission of its kind in the entire country. Since the Commission is an official entity, charged by the state legislature with the task of promoting Washington beer as a commodity, I would like to think they have some influence. I would like to think that the city would not stand in the way of the Commission as they try to help the local beer industry grow and prosper.
Still, would the city allow it?
Truthfully, I cannot imagine it. I just don’t see the City of Seattle doing something so, I don’t know… something so logical. The City’s default answer to anything these days seems to be “No, we can’t do that.” Logic be damned.
If we want to have the kind of beer festival I’m talking about, we need to figure out a way to make it about free speech or equal rights. In some regards, I actually do feel discriminated against when the law requires me to willingly enter a cage to drink beer. What are we? Animals in a zoo? We could call ourselves People for the Ethical Treatment of Beer Drinkers, but that makes for an ugly acronym. Beer for Urban Recreational Purposes?
Beer Enthusiasts for Equal Rights? Now that’s got a ring to it.